Yeah, Right, Lisa. A Wonderful, Magical Animal.

Do any of us actually stop and think, before we eat Thanksgiving dinner, that this turkey was once a living, breathing creature?  How about before we sink our teeth into that burger?  And why is it that some of us find the idea of eating a cow's buttocks so much more appealing than eating its tongue?  Why is it okay to eat a slimy fish that you caught at the lake but not a cat?  

On a separate topic, I think that the vegan diet is a result of too many city people with nothing to do thinking too much.  You would think more exposure to the actual event of killing an animal for food would make people less likely to eat that animal, but farmers don't seem to have any trouble ringing a chicken's neck, ripping out all its guts, pulling off all its feathers, roasting it in an oven, and then savoring every bite.  No, I think it's because the ignorant city folk feel betrayed.  They grow up with cute stuffed cows, cow decorations, and cow cartoon characters.  When it finally dawns on them that they are eating Betsy every time they go to Burger King, they get upset.  If they were around the cows like the farmers, ranchers, and dairy workers who slaughter them, they would realize what disgusting and stupid animals they are.  Then they would have no objections.  

"Liiiisaaa! Don't eeeeat me!"

Mailman Steve

I propose we build a memorial for "Mailman Steve" Padgett.  He's not dead yet, but he's got diabetes and heart disease so we'd better get started.

Mailman Steve worked for the U.S. Postal Service and stopped delivering junk mail in 1999.  And guess what...  Nobody complained!

Unfortunately, a utility worker (let's lynch him!) turned in our hero.  His customers, of course, were not upset with him when they were informed of his "crime."  But he was given a $3000 fine, 500 hours of community service, and three years probation.

If everyone who hates junk mail would send Mailman Steve a quarter, we could make him a rich man!  Way to go Steve!

Proverbs

I wish I had the Proverbs from the Bible memorized.  There are so many of them that would be perfect to bust out in every day situations.  Here are some examples:

You're minding your own business, playing a little Xbox, and your wife won't stop bugging you to take out the trash.

You say, "A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.  Proverbs 27:15."

Sister So-and-So's child won't behave in your primary class.

You say, "Sister So-and-So, Withhold not correction from the child; for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell. Proverbs 23:13-14."

You go out with friends and your friend's wife keeps blabbing about shoes or fat-free dressing or you-don't-know-what because you stopped listening.

You say, "A fool uttereth all [her] mind, but a wise [woman] keepeth it in till afterwards. Proverbs 29:11."

Your daughter wants to buy the latest copy of Seventeen magazine with Paris Hilton on the cover.

You say, "A whore is a deep ditch. Proverbs 23:27."

You ask you chemistry student what the atomic number of oxygen is.  He says he doesn't know.

You say, "In the lips of him that hath understanding wisdom is found; but a rod for the back of him that is void of understanding. Proverbs 10:13."

Good stuff.

Arrested!

After doing some hard time in the big house, Jacob is out on bail.  While in the slammer he managed not to drop the soap in the shower or get shanked in the yard over a carton of cigs.  His only regret is that he wasn't awarded a conjugal visit.

Way to Go New Hampshire!

Great news! The state of New Hampshire is implementing one of my ideas! (Apparently, it wasn't an original Miles idea.)

Read the sixth proposal in my "Money and Education" entry and then read the following article:

http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1857336,00.html?xid=feed-yahoo-full-nation-related

I was so excited that I commented on Yahoo's Buzz feature:

"I absolutely agree with what New Hampshire is doing. Students serious about college are stifled and bored. Students not interested in college are miserable and resentful. Everyone just ends up wasting their time and the school district's resources. This is the kind of innovation our educational system needs!"

Prop 8

I thought I was done with politics for a while. Truthfully, I'm tired of politics. It felt good to do a blog about Snow Football Day. But the protests in California, especially in front of the temple, have been thought provoking and I can't help but share my feelings on the subject.

What is the push behind the legalization of gay marriage in California? Will they be awarded additional legal benefits? Homosexual couples in a "domestic relationship" in California are already given practically every benefit and privilege awarded to heterosexual married couples. Or is it a civil rights question? The battlecry is "equality." They say they want the American people, including the LDS church, to confirm that they are equal. Equal as people? Equal in worth?

The LDS church, the gay and lesbian community's new favorite target, has repeatedly stated its position that homosexuals are of equal worth--that the church reaches out to them and its members regard them as their brothers and sisters. But homosexuals want the American people to confirm the principle that their relationships are equal to that which is had between a man and a woman bound in holy matrimony. This we cannot do. It is not hatred or bigotry. It is simply stating our belief that marriage is a sacred institution and that a homosexual relationship is not that sacred institution!

It is not a fundamental right to "marry whoever I want." Heterosexuals don't have that right either! If I wanted to marry anyone or anything besides an adult woman not too closely related to me, do you think the government would recognize that union? Do you think the church would champion my cause? Marriage is not simply an expression of love. LDS church members believe it has an Eternal purpose. And whether you call it a marriage or not, a homosexual union will never fulfil that purpose.

To ask members of the church to deny that is to ask us to deny our beliefs. Do they think that I would go to church if I didn't believe what is being taught? Is it some kind of social club? No! It's hard work! It requires sacrifice!

As far as the "seperation of church and state" issue goes... I don't care what kind of legislation is in question, if you are going to make a decision to support it or oppose it you will make that decision based on what you believe is right. If some Americans actually believe in religion, church will affect what they believe and church will always have an effect on government issues. As long as religion exists, the two are inseperable.

Snow Football!!!

There is no annual event that I anticipate with more excitement than snow football. Better than the 4th of July, better than Thanksgiving, better than Christmas. Snow football day is the highlight of the year. (I guess it'll be pretty cool when my child is born, but that's not until February.)

On Snow Football Day (yes, I've decided to capitalize it) I get to be Steve Young, Jerry Rice, Lawrence Taylor and Barry Sanders all rolled into one. It is my Superbowl. I will throw touchdown passes while absorbing big hits from sisters-in-law, I will juke and stiff arm little sisters and leave them in a flurry of white powder, I will tackle brothers with bone-jarring hits, I will throw decleating blocks to break long runs for nieces, I will stuff rushing friends to complete magnificent goal line stands and, if he has the courage to show up, I will sack my dad when he tries to sit in the pocket too long.

Then I will go inside and have some hot chocolate.

So if you're going to be within driving distance of Utah valley around Christmas, keep your cleats with you and your eyes on the weather. Here's a little video to get you all as pumped up as I am.


Football - Sportscenter - Sportscenter Nfl S Greatest Hits - The funniest videos are a click away

President Elect

I do not agree with the political philosophies and policies of our new president elect, Barack Obama. I do not agree with penalizing success. I do not agree with forcing American citizens to share their wealth (thereby robbing the rich of the chance to part with it freely and the poor of gratitude). I do not agree with expanding government involvement in every aspect of our lives (meddling in education, healthcare, and business will only make things more inefficient, complicate our lives, and provide more opportunity for corruption). I do not agree that legal abortion is in the best interest of American women.

That being said, I think that the United States had some victories last night. The fact that the American people chose a black man to serve in its highest political office is evidence that we have, for the most part, overcome a terrible part of our past. (If nothing else, it means that we won't have to hear as much spew from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.) I hope that the election of a black president by a white majority will help heal the relationship between white Americans and Americans of other races.

I also believe that appointing Barack Obama to serve as president will instantaneously improve damaged relationships with foreign powers. He has not been painted as an imperialist or a warmonger by the foreign media. He is eloquent and carries himself with dignity (although he needs a sense of humor).

So, although he won't be taking the country in the direction I would have liked, I will audaciously hope that he takes it in a good direction. It will be interesting to see what he is able to accomplish in the next four years and whether he is still as popular as he is now.

Money and Education

Americans spend $8,000 every year on each student in grades K-12. The median salary for an American worker is $40,000. So if you're making the median salary, have two kids, and are pulling your own weight, 40% of your salary goes to your kids' education! Three kids? 60%! In other words, Americans are getting an incredible bargain from the government when it comes to education. And the government is not getting a return on its investment. Only 18-30% of 4th graders are "proficient" in reading, math, science, and history. (And from my experience, it doesn't take much to be proficient.)

So what do Americans call for? "We must spend more money on education!"

Is a lack of funding the problem? Despite per-pupil expenditures well above average, American pupils score well below average on international assessments. So, obviously, money is not the problem. If I were to reform the education system, I would spend less, not more. I would cut wasteful spending and pay teachers more. Here are some ideas.

1. Textbooks. Why do we buy new textbooks every few years? Has algebra changed in the past few centuries? Physical science? English? Basic chemistry? Newtonian physics? No! So why are we paying top dollar for new textbooks every few years? The most expensive part of buying any book is intellectual property--nifty designs, pictures, the wording the author used to describe a principle. So let's stop paying textbook publishers to rearrange the design in their books. How about publishers that recycle textbooks? Have the schools send their old books in, recycle the paper, and reprint the same book.

2. Base teacher salary on performance. We need to start treating the teacher position as what it is--a job. In the real world, supervisors observe their employees and the results of their labor and give them raises accordingly. For some reason we give teachers raises based on how old they are instead of how good they are at teaching. I do not think teachers should get paid based on how well their students do on standardized tests. (They can't help it if the student is completely unmotivated and has no support at home.) But let's start trusting principals to gauge the worth of their employees as we trust supervisors in the private sector.

3. Reduce cost of "free or discounted lunches." About 20% of students in Idaho are now on this program. Free and discounted lunches are paid for by the USDA and students who actually pay for their own lunches. "Oh, you're going to pay for your own lunch? Well, then you're going to pay for that kid's lunch, too." No way! From now on, if you don't pay for your kid's lunch they're getting gruel. What the #&@! are you using your food stamps for? Oh, you're not on food stamps? Then buy your kids some food! It's called a "sack lunch!"

4. Open Office. School districts that use the program Open Office instead of Microsoft Office save hundreds of thousands of dollars every few years. Teachers can also find a wealth of free resources online instead of ordering expensive programs, images, and animations from software companies.

5. Have the students clean up. Look at other countries that perform better than the United States in education. They make the students clean the school every day before they dismiss. Not only would the school districts save money, but the students would take better care of the school.

6. Provide alternatives for unmotivated students. How many students refuse to perform well in school because they don't see the point? Why do we force them to learn things they know full well they will never use in their lives? We make them sit in the classroom wasting everyone's time with disciplinary problems and using up resources. If they know they're going to mechanic school, let them go! As soon as they can read and write, perform simple arithmetic, and know their rights and responsibilities as a citizen let them go to mechanic school! That's more than schools are accomplishing now with a lot of kids and it would provide motivation to learn. "As soon as you learn this you can go."

7. Streamline higher education. I don't want to get rid of the great universities that dot our nation. But I'd like to provide cheaper alternatives. Let's have colleges that are good at one thing--training people for employment. No gymnasium, no student center, no sports, no landscaping, no band...nothing that isn't necessary for education. Hire professors that are there to teach rather than to do research.